THE NATIONAL VOICE OF FAMILIES
PROTECTING FAMILIES FROM THE FAMILY COURT SYSTEM

FAMILY LAW PLAYBOOK

 

Excerpt From www.GreatDivorceAdvice.com   All Rights Reserved.  Please Purchase Full Report and Support Matt O’Connell.

“Gender matters!  Don’t let anybody tell you differently.  So let me ask you the question again; Are men and women treated the same?  Of course not.  I can’t emphasize this enough when dealing with family court.  Don’t expect equal treatment.  In most states, family court provides women with an arsenal of legal weapons to use against men during a divorce; especially if there are children involved.  These dirty tricks are often used to force you out of your home giving her a leg up in a custody battle.  The following is a short list of the more common tactics and dirty tricks:

1) The Emergency Protection Order:  This is a classic.  If she wants you out of the house in ten minutes, she can do so with one quick phone call to the police.  If you’re home when the police arrive, you’ll spend the night in jail.  Period!  Don’t expect to be able to reason with the police.  You might be innocently watching TV and may not even be aware the police have been called.  She doesn’t require any proof.  The cops show up, she claims you hit or pushed her and points in the living room and you get dragged out of the house in handcuffs, no questions asked.  It’s the law in all 50 states.  Generally, you get released the next morning.   The best defense against this one is not being home when the police arrive.  If you suspect the police are on the way, get out as if the house is on fire!  The police will not spend any time looking for you.  If you’re home when the cops ring the doorbell, you’re off to jail for the night.  If you’re unlucky enough to be a victim of this ploy, it’s vital you cooperate fully with the police.  Don’t take it out on the cops; they’re just doing their jobs.  Believe me; they know it’s all BS.  Stay cool, be polite, and the police will too.  Don’t make a bad situation worse by blowing up.  She wants nothing more than seeing you blow up and threaten her with the police as witnesses.  Don’t fall into her trap.  She wins this round.

2) The Order for Protection:  This is a more humane twist to the protection order listed above.  She files a complaint at the courthouse that you’re “threatening her”.  The next day, the police show up at your house and serve you with a court order ordering you to leave the house.  Often you get only 15 minutes to gather what you can and get out.  You won’t spend the night in jail, but you’re out on the street homeless.  You’ll have a court appearance in a week or 2 where the judge likely makes the order permanent.  Generally, your wife’s attorney advises her to file this false charge just to get you out of the house.  Here too, the goal is staying cool with the police and gathering what you can.  My recommendation is to collect your most valuable items.  Take your jewelry, coin collection, etc.  Two weeks from now when you’re out of the house forever, you’ll be glad you grabbed your coin collection instead of your $2 toothbrush.  If this happens to you, pack as if the house is about to be destroyed by a fire in 15 minutes, don’t pack like you’re going on vacation for a weekend.  Hot Tip!  Grab the valuables first; you can always buy more socks and underwear.  If you’re in custody battle and/or fighting over the house, you can expect to be hit with this one.  If you’re in a custody battle and still living with your soon-to-be-ex, my advice to you is to move your valuables out of the house before this happens.  Hot Tip:  As you’re pulling out of your driveway looking at the Sheriff in the rearview mirror, break out your cell phone and start calling all the utility companies.  Get your name off the gas, electric, telephone, cable TV, etc.  You don’t live there anymore and you never will again!  Disconnect utilities if you have to; just get your name off everything.  Delays will be costly and you’ll need your all your cash in the future.  Let her start paying her own bills.

3) Physical Abuse Against the Children:  If you’re in a custody battle with children under age 10, you can count on this allegation being made against you sooner or later.  In any other court, you’d be innocent until proven guilty.  But this is family court; the facts (like the constitution) mean nothing here.  If you’re accused, you’re guilty.  Don’t expect your Ex to have to prove anything.  The good news, because everybody involved (including the judge) knows this is a false accusation, you’ll never be charged with a crime.  The bad news, you’re separated from your children and likely put into “supervised visitation.”

4) Sexual Abuse Against the Children:  Known as the “Weapon of Mass Destruction” of the custody battle, many feel this is the lowest trick in the book.  As with all false physical abuse charges, you’re not charged with an actual crime; the goal is to keep you from seeing the kids . . . and boy does this one work.  It takes weeks, if not months to sort everything out.  While some bureaucratic worker from the state or county is investigating the allegations made against you, you’ll be banned from any contact with your children until the investigation is complete.  Then once the investigation is complete and no evidence is found, you’ll likely face months of supervised visitation.   Like proof, evidence, and facts mean nothing in family court.  The family court judge always acts as if you’re guilty.  Nobody (except you) ever accuses the judge of being “too cautious”.  The judge thinks “better safe than sorry” and acts accordingly.

5) Supervised Visitation:  If you’re accused of abuse, supervised visitation is almost automatic.  You’re restricted to visiting the kids at a supervised visitation center in your community (I’ll bet you never knew such places existed did you?).  You arrive at the center and go to a secure room.  Ten minutes or so; your children arrive for a 1-3 hour visit.  You can play, read books, etc.  A person in a white lab coat with a clipboard observes you and your children and writes down everything you do and say.  A copy of this report is sent to your ex-wife and the judge.  Bring your checkbook.  You can expect to pay $40-$100 per visit.

6) Placing the Children in Therapy:  Sending the kids to a child psychologist is a great way for the mother to gain a court-approved ally.  This tactic is especially effective if the kids are pre-teens and can’t really speak for themselves.  Because the kids are in the midst of a divorce, they’re obviously suffering; nobody questions the benefits of sending them to a competent therapist during this stressful time in their lives.  But, what if the mother has nasty motives?  Therapy presents a terrific opportunity for the mother to blame you for all the children’s problems.  The common scenario:  mother takes the kids to the therapist while you’re at work.  She tells (often with tears) the therapist how neglectful a father you are etc.  Now, since you’re not there to defend yourself, the therapist becomes nothing more than a witness to write letters to the judge at the mothers urging.  In court, it’s your word against the “so-called” independent therapist.  Who do you think the judge is going to side with?”  All Rights Reserved.  Purchase Full Report from Matt O’Connell.